Living Well Despite Adversity
Different Dream welcomes author Harriet Cabelly as today’s guest blogger. She’s here for an interview about her new book, Living Well Despite Adversity, for parents and caretakers of loved ones with special needs.
Question #1: Why did you write Living Well Despite Adversity?
The idea that we all go through bad things and yet some people come through and live on well while others seem to crumble, has been a passion of mine for as long as I can remember. Since no one gets through this life unscathed–loss and pain is part of the human condition–the key is how to live well despite….
When my middle daughter miraculously survived and fully recovered from her medical crisis, I looked for something positive to do with this miracle. This book is an outgrowth of both my life theme and what I consider to be my new lease on life. This has been part of my personal post traumatic growth.
Question #2: There are some well-known people in this book. How did you get them to do an interview for you?
The simple answer – I asked! My new and evolved way of living has become going beyond my comfort zone, taking risks and not being afraid of being told no. I did stop at Oprah though; I didn’t ask her. Maybe for my next book of interviews!
Question #3: What are some key concepts you’d like your readers to take away?
The main concept is that it’s not about circumstance; it’s about our response to our situation. That’s what got me interested in this theme to begin with. I would see similar things happen to many people. I became fascinated and inspired with how it was that some could rise above and carry on and others would remain in the depths of despair? So then it’s not necessarily what happens to us; it’s how we respond. I first learned of this concept in Viktor Frankl’s book, Man’s Search for Meaning.
Another key idea is that of choice. We can choose how we respond and we can shape our attitude. It’s not just how and what we’re born with.
Which brings me to the last point: we can grow our resilience. It’s not a fixed amount in our inborn or genetic pool. We all have internal strengths which we can build on and bring forth more to our benefit.
Question #4: What are you hoping readers will get from this book?
I’m hoping they will get inspiration from those they read about; but more that that they will see that it is possible to cope and live on well through their personal challenges. I hope they take on some of the ideas and concepts and begin to incorporate and apply them in their lives. I want them to feel hopeful in their own difficulties – that there can be light once again with intentional actions and ways of living.
Question #5: Who will this book appeal to?
Since the theme of dealing and living with hardships and loss is universal. I think it can appeal to everyone. As I said initially, we all have rough and painful things to contend with in our lives, therefore the array of various circumstances and adversities that are highlighted here will hopefully resonate with many, many people. The ideas and tools are applicable to all. And life lessons abound!
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Harriet Cabelly is a social worker, speaker and workshop facilitator who has appeared on ABC News as a parenting coach and on WOR Radio’s Change Your Attitude, Change Your Life show as a guest coaching expert. As a positive psychology coach, Harriet journeys with her clients as they cope with and grow beyond their painful situations.
By Jolene
Jolene Philo is a published author, speaker, wife, and mother of a son with special needs.
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To all those who responded to this post: I thank you for your responses in the hope of ‘winning’ my book. We are all struggling in some way. I too have a daughter with disabilities. She’s 35 now and I am happy to say she is living her potential, learning and continuing to grow. That’s what we want for all people, regardless of their ‘issues’ – to live their best life.
May you all find purpose, meaning and joy in your lives and always hold onto the light, even during the dark times. It is our ‘job’ to mine for the gold and discover the riches of life, with all its challenges.
I would love to read this book to learn how to handle life raising a child with autism. My son is actually 18yrs old a young man now but I still find myself sometimes in a complete state of worry as if I am just learning about his diagnosis for the first time. I like to have a better handle on how to not handle setbacks like a major crisis and to stop being hard on myself as a mother.
Sounds like a wonderful way to pay it forward for others to learn how to be overcomers. It’s not the circumstances that define us it is how we respond to them. Brilliant and worth putting into action.
Thank you
Joan Elder
I have a group of moms I meet with who have children with various mental health disorders (including myself). We are in desperate need of resources like these!
I want to read this book! Our response to things is what dictates how we feel. I could use the help in learning how to navigate the difficulties without being crushed by them.
I would love to read this book! I am a mom of four and my oldest has an autism spectrum disorder along with psychiatric issues, her needs have been pretty intense for the last year and a half. My husband and I also care for family members with physical and emotional struggles as well as dementia. It sometimes feels like we are drowning. I had a health scare of my own last weekend, which has really made me think about how I need to live better and to take care of myself so that I can take care of everyone else, and to really live instead of just getting through each day.
I would love to read this book. I too think how we respond to our circumstances is key. We all go through something.