Special needs appointments can be hard on kids and their parents. But today, Nancy Flanders shares her secret for turning medical appointments like clinic visits and even medical tests into special time with Mom or Dad. This is such a good idea, I wish my kids were young enough to try it!
Special Needs Appointments:
Turning Doctor Visits into Special Time
by Nancy Flanders
When Maggie was first diagnosed with cystic fibrosis, CF clinic was a once to twice a month affair for over a year. Usually my husband or my mother came along so that someone could tend to Maggie while the other one paid attention to the doctor and nurse and medical assistant and dietitian and social worker and respiratory therapist. Tired yet? Then once Katie was born, the clinic became a family affair. My mother and father both came along to help me with my nursing baby and active toddler. Whew! Usually, Maggie was overwhelmed and often uncooperative. Now, things are a bit different.
Clinic day is now officially Mommy and Maggie day.
So far this year Maggie and I have had four Mommy and Maggie clinic days in five months, and she keeps asking for more. It turns out that the less people who come with us, the better off we are. She’s happier, more polite, and better behaved overall.
The Star of the Show
Obviously, being the only child again, even if just for a few hours, has her feeling like a star. She has my undivided attention and there’s no baby sister around for clinic staff to go ga-ga over. She rides in the car alone with me, gets to go on the elevator alone with me, waits in the room for the doctor alone with me, and gets to out to lunch or even shopping alone with me. She loves it because she feels special in that way that being the center of someone’s attention makes a person feel unique and important.
The Big Girl Effect
Going to clinic without her baby sister makes her feel like she’s doing something only big girls can do. Just like she believes Katie is too little for treatments, she also believes Katie is too little for clinic. Clinic is something special that’s just for Maggie and makes her feel all grown-up. She walks around with pride beaming across her little chubby cheeks the entire time we’re there. (Except, however, when they are trying to stick a cotton swab in her throat.)
Choices, Choices
On Mommy and Maggie days, she also gets to decide what she’s wearing and whether or not she wants to wear her doctor’s coat and carry her doctor’s kit. When we get to clinic, everyone usually goes crazy over how cute she looks. She usually answers with an enthusiastic YEAH in agreement, although she’s getting better at saying thanks. Choices equal power, and giving her even the smallest of choices, makes her feel like important.
Toys All for Her
The best part of clinic may be the toys that are brought to our room just for her. She always asks for the toy food so she can have a picnic on the floor. There’s no one running up and stealing a fake apple from her, plus Mommy or the child life specialist sits down and plays with her. She can hardly contain herself as she asks for the toys the moment we get to the room. After that, she’ll let the doctor look her over without so much as a kick to the gut. (Progress!) We’re still working on the throat culture, but those lollipops really do help.
Frequent doctor visits full of tests and needle pricks are really tough on kids with special health needs. Turning each visit into a special day (only a few hours really) of fun including lunch at a restaurant or shopping at the toy store has helped Maggie get through it all with a pretty big smile – most of the time. She frequently asks when the next Mommy and Maggie day will be, because that one-on-one time means the world to her – and me.
How Do You Help Your Child with Special Needs Appointments Cope?
Nancy has developed a simple and creative way to help Maggie cope with the doctor’s appointments her special needs require. Have you developed strategies to help your child? What do you do? How does your child respond? Leave a comment to tell us what does and doesn’t work for you and your child with special needs. Learn more aout Nancy at www.chronicadmissions.blogspot.com and www.parentingsquad.com.
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