Kristin Faith Evans understands first-hand the stresses of special needs parenting. In this post, she explains coping strategies she’s used to keep her focused and calm in the middle of the storms of life.

Soon after my daughter with complex needs came home from the hospital, I began struggling to cope with her care needs. I learned that parents of children with special needs must use additional coping strategies more often than parents of children without disabilities. Research shows two skills in particular can help parent caregivers better manage the added stress.

1. Mindfulness

Mindfulness is simply fully participating in the present moment. For example, if you’re washing dishes, slow down and feel the warm water on your skin, focus on scrubbing the dish, smell the soap, and notice your feet on the floor. If your mind wanders to your to-do list, simply come back to your present task.

By being fully present in doing one thing at a time, your anxiety about the future and your painful emotions about the past can lower in intensity. Regularly practicing mindfulness can actually effectively rewire the neural networks in your brain and reduce the negative effects of stress. Practicing mindfulness also contributes to decreased depression and anxiety, improved long-term physical and mental health, higher quality of life, and an easier time adapting. Parenting mindfully can improve your interactions with your child and their development and even reduce your child’s problematic, aggressive, or self-injurious behaviors.

Try this:

Take three minutes today to stop and simply be in the present moment. Notice what you hear, smell, feel, and see. Observe your breathing. Take a slow, deep breath then return to your day.

Here are some free mindfulness apps you can try:

Smiling Mind
UCLA Mindful app
Mindfulness Coach by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs

2. Gratitude

I discovered it can become easy to feel stuck and overwhelmed by the stress, making it difficult to see past my challenges. About five years ago, I began making a list of Scriptures about thankfulness. I posted the verses on my bathroom mirror and recorded them in a journal. I now stop during the day, take a slow deep breath, and thank God for the blessings I’m grateful for that day. This brings a smile to my face and gives me new perspective.

Practicing gratitude can improve our physical and mental health, lower our stress levels, and make us more resilient as disability parents. Expressing thankfulness to God can give us new hope and joy and help us see our circumstances in a new light.

These are two easy ways to practice gratitude:

Meditate on Scriptures

Try focusing on memorizing one verse or reading the verse out loud. Here are some sample verses: Psalm 9:1, Psalm 107:1, 1 Corinthians 15:57, 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Start a gratitude journal

Write down one thing for which you are thankful each day or write out your prayers thanking God. On days you feel discouraged, go back and read through your list.

I hope these two coping skills for families with disabilities help lower your stress levels and bring you more joy.

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Photo by Scott Umstattd on Unsplash