Managing Sensory Sensitivity with Grace
Sensory sensitivity is a part of the lives of many kids with special needs. That means sensory sensitivity exposure is part of the lives of their parents. Parents like guest blogger Rebekkah Benimoff and her sister-in-law, Stephanie, who have learned to manage sock strings and sensory sensitivity with grace.
Sock Strings or Managing Sensory Exposure With Grace
by Rebekah Benimoff with Stephanie McIntyre
For moms of sensory sensitive kids, daily life is filled with many strategies for helping our precious kiddos manage sensitivity to noise, crowds, touch, smells, textures, bright lights, bothersome clothing, and new experiences—any one of which can be distracting, but when combined, are often overwhelming.
My son was not diagnosed with sensory processing disorder until he was six, but my nephew was diagnosed at about age three. Every now and then my sister-in-law Stephanie and I get a chance to share notes. We both work daily to stay ahead of known triggers. Like cutting sock strings before breakfast. Or making sure that the winter coat is not too puffy or restricting. Or giving “brother breaks” so one often overwhelmed sibling of a sensory kid can have some time to desensitize, too.
For us, this is a day in the life of a mom. It’s what we do because we love our kids. We do it without thinking or lamenting (usually). We don’t compare what we go through to others because we know the special gifts in our life are exactly what God has (or will grow us to be) equipped for.
And while it is important not to compare journeys, it is also important to give ourselves credit for how hard we work to take care of our kids—because we love them. Sometimes, we do not even realize all the extra things we do to help our children. The differences in caregiving strategies bleed into each other, and we don’t quite appreciate all we manage.
But it is important to acknowledge the good work we do. We parents work hard—and while we may have regrets over what we sometimes miss, it is important to give ourselves credit for all the things we don’t miss. We need to seize grace daily—and more than once a day.
Parenting is not easy. There are difficulties to work through, and times when we struggle due to caregiver’s fatigue. When confronted with feelings of failure and inadequacy, or medical issues that cause us to feel broken, commending ourselves can build up deflated spirits.
Recently I checked in with our family counselor. We talked about the diagnoses I manage as a caregiver. And our closing thought was this: I deal with all this—and I do good! I forget this sometimes. I forget to appreciate all that I carry, to give due credit, realistic understanding that life with any special issue is, at times, a challenge.
Talking with other parents who understand helps. It is also good to take personal time to recognize how much extra I really carry and to give myself abundant grace for where I missed the mark, focusing instead on the TRUTH that I work hard.
It is so important to give myself permission to be congratulated on a job well done. So, from one special needs caregiver to another, permission is granted, here and now to appreciate yourself. Take time today to look lovingly at all the extra special care you give and celebrate that YOU DID GOOD!
How Are You Doing Good?
What remarkable, unique ways do you do take care of your family? What do you do to take care of you? Do you take time to appreciate your hard work, and a job well done?
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By Rebekah Benimoff
Rebekah Benimoff is the wife of a husband with PTSD and the mother of two young men, both of whom grew up with medical and special needs. She blogs at In the Chaos…. and In the Calm (justmemama.blogspot.com).
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Thank you for the recommendation and the link, Duncan.
Jolene
It took some doing, but we found a clothing company that she loves because the fabrics are never scratchy or itchy and the seams are hidden. Here’s the link if anyone is interested. http://www.twirlygirlshop.com/girls-maxi-dress
Excellent!