Time management can be a struggle for parents of kids with special needs. Today, guest blogger Amy Stout begins a two-part series about the time management wisdom she’s gained over the past year. In Part One, she shares three ways to adjust her attitude. Tomorrow, in Part Two, she’ll explain how to apply some corporate world knowledge to parenting kids with special needs.

Tried and True Time Management Tips, Part 1

I recently complained to a support group that I coordinate that I never have enough time.

Even when I am at my most efficient, time seems to run short. Part of this is because I spend an insane amount of time being my six-year-old daughter’s personal administrative assistant.  As you are well aware, there is so much paperwork, reporting, and scheduling involved in caring for a child who experiences special needs. I know I am preaching to the choir. You all are in the trenches with us laboring for your loved one to receive the best care possible.

But… sometimes, in addition to the best care, our loved ones also need the best of US. And, if you are anything like me, ME always comes last. That is a problem. A BIG problem. Especially when ME is put out of commission due to health issues because ME didn’t take care of herself.

I am speaking from a place of experience. This little fact became true in my life about a year ago, and I learned a good lesson the hard way. I need to take care of ME with the same devotion and meticulous care in which I give to my loved one who experiences special needs. If I am not at my best, I cannot give my best to my loved one.

So, while the things I will share are not necessarily original with me, they are things that have greatly impacted my view on life and time management AND, in the last year, influenced the care I give to myself. These are just a few things I have benefited from:

We Always Have a Choice

You will hear many people say “I did _______________(fill in the blank) because I had no choice.” The TRUTH is that we always have a choice. Everything is a choice. We don’t HAVE to do anything. However, with every choice there are rewards and consequences. We “get to” decide what choices we make, whom we please, what tasks get done, and what is important to us and our families. It is a privilege to determine how we want to spend our time. But, many of us see this as a burden rather than it being freeing. This is all a matter of mindset. We have to change our thinking to give ourselves permission to make the choices we want to make or need to make and then taking responsibility for them.

We Only Get One Life

This is something I tell myself when I feel like I am in a corner and am about to commit to something that I am feeling pressured into or something that I am not completely sold out about. We only get ONE life. We get to choose how we want to live that life or how we want to impact the lives of others by how we live and the choices we make. When we place the fact that time is running out in front of our awareness, it radically changes the pressures that previously we might have felt and helps us to make a decision based on what we really want to do or what we feel is necessary.

It Is Okay to Say NO

Learning to say “no” was one of the most difficult things I ever encountered. It was a process because in my life, everyone always said yes (and were frazzled). I didn’t have a good role model of someone who was confident in saying no. Someone who was not guilt-ridden or who didn’t take on the pain of the world because they felt their “no” was letting someone or some organization down.

It is really important to be honest and truthful—especially in our answers, volunteering, and responses. Each of us is designed differently, and we won’t all have the same interests or passions for service. You need to make the best choice to support ways that you and your time can best be utilized.

It is okay to not be popular for a time because, in the end, you will excel in the areas that you know are a good fit for you and your talents and passions. If you mindlessly sign up for things you are not gifted at, you can be a detriment to that cause and a time waster.
Note: This is NOT a free pass to always stay on the sidelines and never get involved.

What Time Management Lessons Have You Learned

Now that you’ve read what Amy’s learned, it’s your turn to share what you’ve learned about time management lately. Please leave your wisdom in the comment box and come back tomorrow for Part Two of the series.

Tried and True Time Management Tips, Part Two

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