Birth Announcements for a Child with Special Needs
The birth of every child is a wonderful event parents long to share with others. However new parents overwhelmed by a special needs diagnosis or facing major medical decisions for their child may not know how to proceed. Should they send an announcement? How much should they tell? How long after the birth is it appropriate to send an announcement? In a post at She Knows Parenting, blogger Maureen Wallace offers answers to many of those questions.
Meet Maureen Wallace
Maureen is the mother to a boy and a girl. Her son Charlie lives with Down Syndrome. In the article, she describes how circumstances made it difficult to think about birth announcements:
By the time Charlie was strong enough to come home with us, heart monitor and all, I was in the full throes of post-partum depression and barely able to engage in conversation without crying. Birth announcements that included a heartfelt testament to our love of Charlie regardless of any challenges meant nothing to me.
Looking back, I realize my regular emails to a lengthy list of family, friends, and even some acquaintances was my way of casting a wide net into a dark and uncertain sea. I desperately hoped someone would grab the line and haul me to safety.
How Other Parents Handled Birth Announcements
Wallace interviewed several parents about how they dealt with special needs birth announcement.
- One family sent birth announcements after their child came home from NICU at five months of age.
- Another dad and mom chose to send an email the day after their daughter was born, explaining her diagnosis.
- A third mom included the following short note in the birth announcement: “Molly is a very healthy baby girl who eats, sleeps, cries, and dirties diapers just like every other baby, she’s just got an extra chromosome!”
- One couple said they chose not to mention their child’s special need because they didn’t want the diagnosis to define their child.
The article is worth a read as it assures parents that whatever they choose to do, it’s their choice. You can read the whole thing at Beyond Baby’s Birth Weight.
How Did You Handle Birth Announcements?
I can’t remember what we did about birth announcements after our son was born in May of 1982, but we did send an update with our Christmas cards. Do you remember how you handled birth announcements? If you do and would like to pass it along, leave a comment in the box.
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By Jolene
Jolene Philo is the author of several books for the caregiving community. She speaks at parenting and special needs conferences around the country. Sharing Love Abundantly With Special Needs Families: The 5 Love Languages® for Parents Raising Children with Disabilities, which she co-authored with Dr. Gary Chapman, was released in August of 2019 and is available at local bookstores, their bookstore website, and Amazon. See Jane Dance!, the third book in the West River cozy mystery series, which features characters affected by disability, was released in October of 2023.
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Wendy,
Thanks for your idea. Including your other child in the announcement was a stroke of genius. How is your little guy doing now?
Jolene
We sent a quick email to family and friends that our son was born 6 weeks early, needed to be transported to another hospital for surgery and would be in the hospital for some time. We then sent formal birth announcements after our son came home from the NICU. We have a son that is 3 years older and wrote that he welcomed home his brother and mentioned that he was now 6 weeks old. We didn’t mentioned TEF and I’m glad. Those close to us knew what we had been through.
You’re most welcome, Maureen. Thanks for dealing with an emotional subject with sensitivity and creativity. And thanks for the link to Carrie’s site. It’s been featured here before, too, and I agree. Carrie’s a terrific writer.
Jolene
Thanks so much for sharing these ideas about a topic that should be fun but can come with some emotional challenges. I also wanted to provide another blog that helped me as I worked on my article for SheKnows: http://www.carriewithchildren.com. Carrie writes about her daughter, Molly (mentioned above). She’s a wonderful writer.
And thanks for stopping by my own blog to let me know this had posted!