After the Diagnosis: Who to Tell and What to Say

by JoleneAug 20, 2012How-Tos, Special Needs Parenting0 comments

After the diagnosis, parents are often unsure about what to do next. Who do they tell? How do they break the news to family, friends, and even to a child?

After the diagnosis, parents are often unsure about what to do next. Who do they tell? How do they break the news to family, friends, and to a child old enough to comprehend what’s happening?

Who to Tell and What to Say

Unfortunately, it’s impossible to create a one size fits all, after the diagnosis checklist about who to tell. But whoever you decide to tell, the article suggests employing these five principles when breaking the news:

Be sensitive to the needs of those you tell.
Be selective about who you tell.
Be age appropriate when sharing the news with children.
Be prepared to explain your child’s condition to a wider range of people as time goes on.

Age-Appropriate Strategies

The article also includes guidelines about how to explain a diagnosis to kids.

Use concrete language with preschoolers and elementary-aged children.
Treat junior and senior high-aged youths as you would an adult.
Consider the level of functioning when speaking to children with developmental delays.

After the Diagnosis and More in Different Dream Parenting

If you’d like more detail about this topic and others like it, you might also like my book Different Dream Parenting: A Practical Guide to Parenting a Child with Special Needs. It contains 24 chapters of practical advice and resources on a variety of topics, from preparing for a hospital stay to passing along your faith and much, much more. (You can look at the table of contents by using the Amazon “look inside” feature.)

How Did You Break the News?

How did you break the news after receiving your child’s diagnosis? What did you do right? What would you go back and do over if you could? How did you tell the children in your life? Share your story so we can all do better in the future!

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By Jolene

Jolene Philo is the author of several books for the caregiving community. She speaks at parenting and special needs conferences around the country. Sharing Love Abundantly with Special Needs Families: The 5 Love Languages® for Parents Raising Children with Disabilities, which she co-authored with Dr. Gary Chapman, was released in August of 2019 and is available at local bookstores, their bookstore website, and Amazon. See Jane Dance!, the third book in the West River cozy mystery series, which features characters affected by disability, was released in October of 2023.