Mother’s Day Grace for Moms of Kids with Special Needs

by Apr 24, 2017Encouragement, Spiritual Support0 comments

Grace for moms of kids with special needs can be hard to find for mothers overwhelmed by their inadequacy. This post points them to hope.

A few weeks ago, I woke up crying after an early morning dream. My pillow was wet with tears, and the vivid accusations hurled during the dream—or should I say nightmare?—haunted my day.

Why didn’t you stand up to the doctors?
Why didn’t you ask more questions?
Why didn’t you shield your baby from pain?
Why didn’t you do more?
Why didn’t you?
Why didn’t you?
Why didn’t you?

For two days, I couldn’t escape the memory of the dream. I wondered at its vehemence 35 years after the arrival of our son, his first surgery the day he was born, and his NICU stay. I was shaken and shamed by my inadequacy as a mother. Suddenly, every wrong decision and poor parenting choice I made during my son’s childhood came to mind. Then I looked at the calendar and saw that Mother’s Day was only a few weeks away. Why would my son call or send a card to a mother who couldn’t give him what he needed most at birth?

A mother who wasn’t with him on the flight to the hospital?
A mother who didn’t protect him from excruciating pain?
I wanted to crawl into a hole.

Instead, I thought of the last time my mother stayed overnight at our house before entering a nursing home. She needed me to help her get on and off the toilet, to get in and out of the shower, to dress in the morning and undress at night.

To read the rest of this post visit Key Ministry’s blog for parents of kids with special needs.

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By Jolene

Jolene Philo is the author of the Different Dream series for parents of kids with special needs. She speaks at parenting and special needs conferences around the country. She’s also the creator and host of the Different Dream website. Sharing Love Abundantly With Special Needs Families: The 5 Love Languages® for Parents Raising Children with Disabilities, which she co-authored with Dr. Gary Chapman, was released in August of 2019 and is available at local bookstores, their bookstore website, and at Amazon.

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Meet Jolene

Jolene Philo is a published author, speaker, wife, and mother of a son with special needs.

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