This week I’m visiting the vast, remote South Dakota country where we lived when our son was born. I’m driving on roads that look like they stretch out forever over miles and miles of short grass prairie in a county with more pronghorn antelope than people per square mile.
Each day, I fight an irrational urge to travel the long miles between Camp Crook, where I am staying, and Rapid City. I’m tempted to arise before dawn and drive, scanning the road, looking for a 1980s era tan Chrysler K car. In my mind, I picture the intent, young father behind the wheel, a worried young mother in the passenger seat, and a small baby strapped into the car seat wedged between them. I imagine their eyes straying to the clock.
Wondering if they’ll get to the Rapid City hospital in time for the baby’s 8 AM appointment with the gastrointestinal doctor.
Wondering if the baby will ignore his empty tummy and stay asleep until they get there.
Wondering how the procedure will go.
Wondering if the procedure will do more good than harm.
I know the hunt would be fruitless. I know this family moved away decades ago. I know the baby is now a young man with his own wife and child. I know the father is now approaching retirement. But there is so much I want to tell that worried mother as she gazes at her baby. Her stomach a knot of anxiety. Her mind racing with questions.
Will I have enough breast milk to keep our baby alive?
Will he be all right?
Will the scar in his esophagus ever stretch out so he can take a bottle again?
Will we ever sleep through the night again?
Will all these medical procedures mess with his head?
Will I ever understand why God is allowing our baby to suffer so?
I want to tell this worried, young mother yes.
The rest of God Is Enough can be found at the Not Alone website.
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